Name: Ali*
Interviewing Organization: Iran Human Rights Documentation Center (IHRDC)
Date of Interview: March 6, 2024
Interviewer: IHRDC Staff
This statement was prepared pursuant to an audio interview with Mr. Ali. There are 19 paragraphs in the statement.
The views and opinions of the witness expressed herein do not necessarily reflect those of the Iran Human Rights Documentation Center.
*Pseudonym assigned to protect the witness’s identity.
Statement
- My name is Ali. I hold two university degrees, although I am self-employed. Just one week after our wedding, a notice regarding my wife’s mehrieh [a marital financial entitlement owed by a husband to his wife] arrived at my doorstep. She had initiated enforcement proceedings in respect of her mehrieh. The mehrieh amounted to 114 Baha-er Azadi gold coins.
- During the one week that we lived together, we were in conflict from the very first night of our marriage. The disputes began because the dowry consisted entirely of second-hand items. Every item was second-hand. I have video evidence of this. An expert assessment was also carried out, and the relevant documentation is available. In fact, exactly one week before the wedding, my father-in-law threw me out of his house. The family was financially very well off and lived in an affluent part of the city.
- The notice of enforcement of the mehrieh arrived one week after the wedding through the Registry Office’s enforcement process. I retained an attorney, and it became clear that they had initiated the proceedings before the wedding. When I returned home, I discovered that all valuable items had been removed from the house. They had taken gold jewellery, one of my briefcases, foreign currency, my laptop, my camera, and virtually everything of value that was in the property. After that, they filed a claim for the return of the dowry. To me, it was nothing short of a complete scam. The only thing I was able to do was change the locks on the house to prevent her from removing the rest of the contents through the court and police authorities. I was then forced to replace, at my own expense, the items that had already been taken. The purpose of the dowry recovery claim was to ensure that she could remove all her belongings in full after only one week of married life—if that could even be called a married life. They also obtained a judgment against me for 600,000 toumans as Ojrat-ol-Mesl [compensation claimed by a spouse for domestic services performed during the marriage beyond her legal obligations]. I went everywhere to object on the grounds that it was unreasonable. I was told, however, that in order to challenge the decision, I would first have to pay 900,000 toumans into the court account. I did not pay the 900,000 Tomans required to pursue the challenge, and as a result, I was forced to pay the 600,000 Tomans instead. As for the issue of tamkin [performance of martial duties], because my wife’s parental home was located in an affluent area, it was argued that I had to provide accommodation that was considered suitable for her social standing before she could be expected to return and live with me. Unfortunately, I rented two separate properties, but both were rejected. Consequently, I was ordered to pay To this day, I continue to pay 2 million toumans per month in alimony.
- Even though I had neither any revenue nor any assets registered in my name, the court ordered me to pay exactly 57 gold coins as the initial instalment of the mehrieh. I filed a claim stating that I was judgment proof, and lodged a complaint against the judge, questioning why I was being required to pay more than half of the mehrieh Normally, the initial instalment is set at around ten gold coins. I later came to believe that the judge and my wife were involved with each other in an improper way. Because I was able to substantiate my allegations with strong documentary evidence, the judge was removed from the case. The original order was subsequently revised to an upfront payment of ten Bahar-e Azadi gold coins, followed by one gold coin every four months by way of instalments. Even then, I refused to make the payments. I said that I would not pay and that they could send me to prison if they wished.
- Although I had a lawyer, I did not declare that I had legal representation. In Iran, if you declare that you have retained a lawyer in a mehrieh case, it may be taken as evidence that you have the financial means to pay. They even went so far as to seize my mobile phone line. After considerable effort, numerous witnesses, and various possible means, I eventually managed to have it released. It was ultimately recognised as exempt property, which enabled me to regain access to my mobile phone line. Nevertheless, it remained under seizure for an entire year. My national identity card was also seized, and all my bank accounts were frozen. As a result, I was effectively unable to conduct even the most basic financial affairs. The tenancy deposit for the property I had rented could not be seized because it was tied to an outstanding loan and was therefore regarded as falling within the category of exempt properties. Apart from that, the only asset registered in my name was a car, which I had transferred to my mother’s name before the marriage.
- A physical altercation occurred between my wife and me when they came to remove the dowry from the house. Before that, both my wife and her father physically assaulted me. Unfortunately, the police officers who were present at the scene sided with them. I asked the officers to testify that they had laid hands on me, but they refused, saying that they would not testify and that they had not seen anything. Unfortunately, the laws of the country tend to favor women.
- I will not divorce her. In fact, some time ago my lawyer contacted them and said, “Five years of your life have already passed. Don’t you want to remarry someday?” My wife reportedly replied, “I am not going to let this go until I receive every last rial of my mehrieh.” They are after money. To this day, I have not paid a single gold coin. They took everything I owned. I do not believe in the concept of mehrieh, and I even told the court that, even if this case ends in bloodshed, I will not pay a single gold coin as mehrieh. They took my entire life away from me.
- I filed a complaint against my wife for taking my foreign currency and personal belongings, but I got nowhere.
- I am a businessman. After we were legally married, but before our wedding ceremony, my wife purchased some goods for one of her relatives and said that they would pay for them in instalments. I said, “We do not sell on credit at all. I have a business partner.” Her father gave me a promissory note and personally said, “This is as security for the 5 million toucan’s worth of goods they have purchased.” The total value of the purchase was actually 7 million toumans. I paid 2 million toumans myself, and they gave the promissory note for the remaining 5 million toumans. I asked, “Who is going to make the payments under this promissory note?” They kept saying, “He will bring the money and pay it; he is short of money at the moment.” They constantly kept putting it off from one day to the next. When problems arose between us, I initiated enforcement proceedings on the promissory note. That became a whole new ordeal for me. Even my lawyer did not think that I would lose the case. The judge ruled in my wife’s favor. He said, “Since you were living in the same house, you stole the document.” I said, “Her father signed it. He personally signed it and even put his fingerprint on it!” He said, “That makes no difference. He has reported it as lost.” I said, “He reported it as lost after I initiated enforcement proceedings on it!” In the end, not only did I have to return the promissory note, but I was also fined 5 million toumans.
- My wife even filed a complaint against me over a text message I had sent her. In the message, I had said, “Remember you were not a virgin. I showed compassion and married you, and you deceived me.” She filed a complaint against me over that. The judge asked me, “Do you deny sending it?” I replied, “No. I sent the text message to my wife. I did not send it to her father. This was a matter between husband and wife.” At that point, the judge brought the matter to a close anddismissed the case.
- Altogether, my wife brought 48 legal cases against me—48 cases! Claims for maintenance, compensation for domestic services, complaints of defamation, insults, the promissory note, recovery of dowry items—48 cases in total! After she recovered her dowry items, I filed a complaint against her, saying that she had taken my gold. They told me that the gold was a gift! I said, “So the dowry items are not gifts, but the gold is!?” This woman took 1.5 billion toucan’s worth of gold from me. She took all the gold that had been given as wedding gifts, the gold that was in my briefcase, and the foreign currency that was in bundles of hundred-dollar notes inside my briefcase. She took all of it. It is simply impossible to prove these things in court. She even took my laptop. She took her own laptop as well, and a laptop was listed among the dowry items. Then they said, “You must buy the laptop.” I said, “Your Honour, the two of us were living together in the same house—a shared home.” He said, “No, it was in your possession.” I said, “I used to leave for work in the morning and come back at night. They looted everything and took them away!” He said, “It is your responsibility, and you must buy it and put it back in its place.”
- All of this happened within that single week. The cases themselves, however, were filed gradually over time. One week after I changed the locks on the house, the complaints started pouring in. I began receiving text message notifications through the Sana system. I had to create an account on the Sana judicial notification system in order to receive and view the court notices. Before that, I did not even have a Sana account, because I had never had any legal cases. I had never done anything unlawful in my life.
- At present, I pay 2 million Tomans a month in alimony. This is separate from compensation for domestic services. I was dragged through the courts and police stations so many times that I practically became a lawyer myself! Compensation for domestic services is paid to a wife for things such as washing clothes, doing the dishes, sweeping the house, and similar tasks. Alimony is basically like a wife’s allowance, for buying clothes, going to the hairdresser, and so on. And then there is the mehrieh, which—excuse me for saying so—is for sleeping with a man! In other words, in Iran, a woman gets paid for absolutely everything.
- Because of the mehrieh, I was placed under a travel ban. I had been awarded a scholarship, and my book was in the process of being published. I am still subject to that travel ban today. I filed a complaint as well, but I was told that the travel ban could not be lifted unless and until I paid the initial instalment of the mehrieh.
- I went into court, slammed my hand down on the judge’s desk, and said, “Issue a warrant for my arrest! Put me in prison right now! I do not know what they are afraid of that they do not send me to prison!” The mehrieh judgment was issued in 2020. From 2020 until now, I have not paid a single gold coin towards it. All they have to do is issue a warrant for my arrest. I would go and surrender myself. Nowadays, when we go to court to negotiate over alimony payments, nobody even mentions the mehrieh—nothing at all. I told them, “I am not going to pay the mehrieh. If you want to, put me in prison!” Instead, they have left me hanging in limbo.
- Alimony payments generally increase by 20% each year and are determined based on factors such as the husband’s income, the wife’s level of education, her social standing and status, her appearance, and the area where her parental family lives. I have heard that the highest alimony award was in District 1 of Tehran, where a childless couple was ordered to pay 4 million toumans per month. If you pay the alimony, the wife loses the ability to seek a divorce on the grounds of hardship and distress. She cannot simply find a way to obtain a one-sided divorce in absentia. She must have grounds that the court considers valid. For example, the husband may have received a criminal sentence of more than five years’ imprisonment, may be physically abusive, or may suffer from addiction, and so on. It is through circumstances such as these that a woman can obtain divorce. Otherwise, she cannot.
- In the marriage contract, I did not grant my wife certain rights, including the right to choose the place of residence, the right to continue her education, and the right to leave the country without my permission. On the night of our engagement ceremony, they required me to pay Shir-Baha [a customary payment made by the groom or his family to the bride’s family]. The amount was approximately 30 million toumans, at a time when one US dollar was worth 10,000 toumans. The dowry inventory was quite laughable. It included entries such as two chickens in the refrigerator, cans of tuna, three kilograms of beans, and four kilograms of bananas. These items were actually listed in the dowry inventory!
- I am still paying 8 million Tomans a month in instalments for all the items my wife took away. My wedding cost me 70 million toumans. The gold that I purchased, along with all the other expenses, was financed through loans, and I am still repaying those loans to this day. The repayments on my marriage loan will finally come to an end in two months’ time.
- I am not worried about myself. I said this in court as well. I am worried about the next generation, so that they do not get caught up in this mess. My life, my youth—everything was ruined. I lost my career opportunities, my educational opportunities, and my chance to emigrate. None of that can be brought back. I am doing all of this for the next person, so that the same thing does not happen to them. Unfortunately, as long as this government remains in power, I do not think the mehrieh laws will ever change. This is genuine misandry. Unfortunately, some women turn it around and say that it is not misandry but misogyny.